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General Discussion

School Bullies

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ZIGGY
ZIGGY
15 Sep 2010 11:02

I felt sadden to read the front page of this weeks Dawlish Gazette. 'Bullies' force mum to keep son at home. The bullies should be named and shamed and pulled out of school as they are a waste of space in school and would rather spend their time plotting to bully than to be educated. I think Tom's mum has the right idea and i'm sure he will end up with a good career. As for the bullies well!

J.Warrener
J.Warrener
15 Sep 2010 14:37

Perhaps Tom also needs to be taught how to stick up for himself

ZIGGY
ZIGGY
15 Sep 2010 15:18

My experience of a confrontation with such people are you come off worse because the bullies are manipulative and have a way of getting out of such situations.

J.Warrener
J.Warrener
15 Sep 2010 15:47

Not if you secretly learn self defence or boxing, then you go for the main bully, who usually isnt the hardest, give them a good slapping and usually all self respect goes down the drain. Bully then tends to quit school.

Amosite
Amosite
16 Sep 2010 05:56

It might be the teachers who are the bullies, its been known to happen, i know of one such female teacher who takes great delight in belittling pupils at a local school

ZIGGY
ZIGGY
06 Oct 2010 13:50

Why is it the victims of bullying have to go back into school part-time while the bullies are allowed to stay full-time plotting who's lives they are going to make hell next. It's interesting to read the horrendous happenings still going on at Dawlish Community College in todays Dawlish Gazette. The letters are from parents of the victims why haven't we seen any response from the parents of the bullies, do they know their children are bullies? do they care? or maybe they are or have been bullies themselves!!!!!!!!!

EmJarvo
EmJarvo
08 Jan 2011 14:56

I have only just come across this website and was interested in reading people's comments regarding my son Tom and the problems we had with Dawlish Community College, both on this thread and another one on this site.

Just in answer to a couple of the comments, Tom did have lessons in Taekwondo and Karate. However, he has a lot of problems with his legs (and is currently undergoing physio etc) and he was unable to continue with the lessons. He is a "lover, not a fighter" and is not interested in getting into fights etc with boys, and WHY SHOULD HE BE, he is just a normal lad who wants to get on with his life.

The response from that school was an utter disgrace and I am glad (but saddened) that other parents came forward with similar stories. I was also contacted personally by other families whose kids had suffered even worse than Tom had. Again, DCC had not dealt with the issues.

Anyway, now the dust has settled, Tom is being home educated, he has a couple of tutors for four hours a week (at our expense!) and spends the rest of the "school day" working from study books and the internet. He is doing really well and is a much happier kid now he is away from that bloody place!

Thanks for the positive comments. However, just for "LYNN", please don't bother replying to this thread as it is very obvious who you work for and I am not interested in listening to anything you say. Everytime there was a discussion, either through the Gazette or Eyes of Dawlish, you were putting your twopennethworth in and now I see that you were doing it on here too!!!! Just what was the reason you were so interested in this topic?????!!!!!

Emma Jarvis

Lynne
Lynne
09 Jan 2011 05:20

@EmJarvo

Please note the correct spelling of my name ( it ends with an 'e').

I shall respond to whatever threads I wish to.

I do not work for anyone.

I am perfectly entitled to put my twopennyworth in whenever, wherever and on whatever I want as indeed I am about to do now by starting another thread about bankers' bonuses.

yorkshirenews
yorkshirenews
10 Jan 2011 03:42

If we are talking about a physical hitting, the first thing to do is call the police and report it as an assault, a school is not some special place where you are free to break the law, however the school is a place where they dont want records of such incidents for ofcom to see, so they kick it in to the long grass.

If he is struck, call the police, make a assault charge, the bully will get a visit from police, his parents will have to go to the police station whilst he is interviewed, even if the bully is not charged you can guarentee it will scare 10 bells from him and his parents and it will stop.

EmJarvo
EmJarvo
10 Jan 2011 04:50

To: Yorkshirenews.

Totally agree and wish we had gone to the Police now, maybe the kids involved would have taken a bit more notice as they never did when they were ocassionally told off by the school!

Did you mean Ofsted? We did contact them and Devon County Council, it would appear that they are as disinterested in this issue as the school were, their response was that the school is self governering and basically dealt with its own issues and they would only get involved if the issue concerned the school as a whole - not helpful and allows the kids / school to do whatever they want!

dawlishphil
dawlishphil
21 Jan 2011 18:03

@EmJarvo

I am sorry to hear about all the troubles your family have been through and hope that Tom is now feeling better in himself and trying to put the past slowly but surely behind him.

As a secondary school teacher myself (thankfully not in Dawlish) I am disappointed with some schools responses to bullying. It is very easy in schools for some students to become the victim, but very difficult for schools to identify, monitor and stop it. Everything these days has to be proven before action can be taken. Far too often schools are aware of what is going on but no longer have the power to do much about it. As for excluding such bullies, quite often that is an action that the individuals enjoy - not having to go to school, no work, no teachers - they love it! Worryingly Head Teachers are reluctant to exclude students for any period of time or even permanently because the government have made so many tables and charts from which to make comparisons that schools do not want this negative data associated to them. More disturbing from my experience, when schools contact parents about their child's behaviour they themselves are either not bothered as to what their child gets up to or are themselves powerless to do anything about it.

@yorkshirenews

Yes, report absolutely everything to the police even if it is not physical bullying. The police have to react to every reporting so the more you make the more they have to act. But then, having said that the police are no longer a threat to some youngsters who enjoy the thrill of the chase from the boys in blue.

If anyone is having problems with the bullying of their child you must approach the school and ask for a copy of their bullying policy. By law this has to be available to you - if it is not already on the school's website. Also ask what safeguarding measures are in place to keep your child safe whilst attending school. If problems fail to improve you must contact the Head Teacher directly, and I would do this in writing also sending a copy to the Chair of Governors and Director of Education @ Devon County Council. Action surely must then be taken by the school. Again if problems persist then copies of all correspondance should be sent again to the Director of Education @ Devon County Council, copies sent to your local MP and a request should be made for an investigation in to the school's handling of your complaint and response to your child's bullying . Your child has the rights to a safe and equal opportunity to be educated in a school environment.

The governments Every Child Matters agenda has five outomes - the first three are to; Be healthy, stay safe and enjoy and achieve. I can guarantee that any child who is being bullied is achieving none of these, therefore schools MUST be accountable.

Please get in touch on here if you need any help with these issues.

Lynne
Lynne
22 Jan 2011 02:06

@dawlishphil

When you say that you are a secondary school teacher but "thankfully not in Dawlish" I am just curious to know why you feel that way. Any chance you could elaborate?

EmJarvo
EmJarvo
22 Jan 2011 14:51

To : Dawlishphil

Thanks for your message.

As I said in a previous message, we did go through all the channels possible. Unfortunately, it seems that nobody is interested in individual matters and that is why myself and others had no choice but to take our kids out of that school.

They do actually have an occasional police presence there but obviously that doesn't do the trick. I guess most kids these days don't see a police figure as "scarey" and why would they if they are used to the same friendly policemen being around regularly.

If I were you then I would ignore the comment from "lynne". As much as she denies having anything to do with the school, she is extremely interested in every comment that is made concerning Dawlish Community College which speaks for itself!

Lynne
Lynne
22 Jan 2011 15:08

@EmJarvo

Why do you put my name in inverted commas? Do you think that is a made-up name?

Do I have anything to do with the school? Yes, I have a child who attends it (and who, incidentally, is very happy there).

So, given that I have a child that attends the school it follows that I would be interested in any comment about it wouldn''t I.

Therefore interested to know why dawlishphil made the comment that he did.

PS Emma - I think you'll find that I'm quite interested in lots of other things as well

EmJarvo
EmJarvo
22 Jan 2011 15:18

Thought you might be glad that I had actually spelt it correctly this time!!!!!!!

Well, you are very lucky that you have a child who is very happy there. Wish I could have said the same but, as you know, I can't.

Funny how you seem to be the only parent who takes such an interest in this matter. What difference, as a parent, does it make to you why Dawlishphil is thankful that he does not teach in Dawlish?

Lynne
Lynne
23 Jan 2011 01:40

"What difference, as a parent, does it make to you why Dawlishphil is thankful that he does not teach in Dawlish?"

How about because I have a child who attends the school that he is 'thankful' he does not teach at.

I can understand you assuming that I might the only parent " who takes such an interest in this matter" because it is always my name on the postings. But you would be wrong to make that assumption. Other parents are interested.

EmJarvo
EmJarvo
23 Jan 2011 03:45

Seeing as you are such an expert on the subject, you will recall the Ofsted Report stating that 6% of parents did not agree that the school kept their child safe. 6% of approximately 800 pupils - You do the maths!

Obviously parents are interested, the welfare of their children is at stake.

Just out of interest Lynne, why do you "not post" on the Facebook Eyes of Dawlish. Is it because you would have to show your profile and would not be able to hide behind the anonymity of your computer?

Lynne
Lynne
23 Jan 2011 04:05

I don't do facebook - period. Not because of any concerns about anonymity but because I just don't and if I was concerned about anonymity I wouldn't use my first name on these postings - I would have made up a name as many do.

I'm not necessarily that anonymous given that I often post on this website a letter that the same week gets published in the Dawlish Gazette and when the Gazette publishes a letter it also gives the full name and address (but not number of house).

I don't claim to be an expert on any subject. But I do have opinions and I do try to find out more about things. Which is why I ask questions and sometimes challenge other people's postings. As indeed others do to me.

Not at all sure what your issue is with me Emma. Glad you agree that parents are concerned so perhaps Dawlishphil would explain what s/he meant by their comment. I'm sure us parents would like to know.

If parents aren't happy with a school then they need to do something about it - as you have done. Up to those 6% what they do - or don't.

Annepartridge
Annepartridge
23 Jan 2011 04:34

I have just found this post and as a parent of a child at DCC this worried me alot to see that this has arose again saddened me. This is a very touchy matter yes I think people have the right to say something but not a full scale argument. A note for Lynne does it realy concern you so much that you have to post on every site about this matter in dawlish and I also have to say to Lynne that I also would be thankful not to be a teacher in dawlish if i was one

Lynne
Lynne
23 Jan 2011 06:04

I could get paranoid ........as I've just tried posting a response but was told there was a problem with this website. ......... so I'll try again.

What other sites have I posted on? Thought this was only this one. In fact if you look at the postings above, Emma is seemingly saying that I should be posting on Eyes of Dawlish. So which is it? That I post too much or I post too little? Just curious.

Totally agree that this argument is getting out of hand but would draw your attention to the fact that I had not posted on this thread at all until after Emma did. A posting in which she accused me of working on behalf of someone or something (presumably the school). I do not. In the same posting she says she is not interested in anything I have to say - but her subsequent postings then belie that statement. She asks me why I am so interested in this subjuct - I tell her it's because I have a child at the school. Then she says that "it's funny that I am the only parent who takes an interest in this matter" . I am not and anyway if I were then what was(is?) the point of all of this publicity and discussion re bullying and Dawlish Community College?

Would still like Dawlishphil (not a made up anonymous name that eh?) to explain what s/he meant.

And finally the Ofsted 6%. Can I just point out that approx 800 students does not equate to approx 800 parents/carers. Those 800 students no doubt have siblings who also attend the school and whilst I have no idea of the number of parents/carers it certainly isn't around the 800 mark. So, of that number (whatever it is) eligible to respond to the survey we have to look at how many actually did so and from that number we can work out the numbers represented by 6%. That is not in anyway to dismiss the fact that 6% expressed concern but rather to bear in mind that as someone once said there are lies, damned lies and statistics.

Now, hopefully this posting will make it onto the board and then I can go off and enjoy my Sunday. You never know I might do some more postings later on - up to you whether or not you read 'em.

dawlishphil
dawlishphil
23 Jan 2011 07:05

@Lynne

When you say that you are a secondary school teacher but "thankfully not in Dawlish" I am just curious to know why you feel that way. Any chance you could elaborate?

I would be embarrassed and saddened to be a teacher in a school which has had quite a lot of bad press about it and one which did not have the locally community fully supporting it. I teach in a school where we have made tremendous efforts to put a lot of negative things right, it has been hard work but i am proud at the progress we have made - not only in improved results, but also in student attitudes and self-belief.

As I live in Dawlish I have a lot of friends who have had children go through or are going through the system at DCC and I can honestly say that there have been more negative comments than positive from them and I am frequently being asked for advice and comments.

There is someone very close to me who had horrendous bullying issues as they went through their secondary schooling (not DCC) and it still, many years on, has great effects on them in their day to day life now. This is why bullying should not be tollerated in any way, shape or form.

I am glad that your child is happy at school but please show some courtesy to others who are not so fortunate in their experiences. It's not just the chid who suffers when being bullied, parents have to go through all the emotions as well!

So Lynne, I make no apology for being a teacher who wants the best for every child.Would still like Dawlishphil (not a made up anonymous name that eh?) to explain what s/he meant. As for ' A khjjfdihgbvghvfddfs

As for 'Would still like Dawlishphil (not a made up anonymous name that eh?) to explain what s/he meant' - if you knew every Phil in Dawlish you would know that there is one of us who is called Phil who teaches! And for a few day delay in responding to this thread I apologise for having a life and not living on this forum.

This was my first posting on this site - thinking I could be supportive or helpful. I cannot believe how this thread has turned out and wish that I had never bothered.

All the best to EmJarvo and family. To Lynne get a life and only post on things which you are genuinely interested in or have a valid input on.

EmJarvo
EmJarvo
23 Jan 2011 07:55

Thanks Phil (and no I don't know you!!!). You have said everything that needs to be said. I also have a life and will not be bothering to even look at this site anymore. Lynne is a busybody, it is extremely clear what angle she is coming from. ENOUGH SAID.

Lynne
Lynne
24 Jan 2011 01:19

Oh dear here we go again.

The reason I pointed out that my child was happy at the school is because that is the case. Others are similarly so. Others it seems are not. I was merely trying to portray more of a balanced picture. I would be interested to know how I have not shown courtesy to others? Please give me examples. I feel perfectly at liberty to correct any misinformation posted on this site concerning myself (see EmJarvo's original posting on this thread).

I agree that bullying should not be tolerated.

My comments re your posting name were in reaction to Emma's comments about me and anonymity. I was merely pointing out that whilst it was of seeming great concern to her that she should know who I am she was not making that same point about others who have posted on this subject.

I also cannot believe how this thread has turned out. I will reiterate - I had not posted on it at all until a certain person made innuendos about me on her posting. Think on.

Still can't understand why, as I am a parent, you think I should not be genuinely interested in bullying issues at the school my child attends. Why is my input not valid?

Emjo - you have yet again made an accusation without explaining what you mean when you write that "it is extremely clear what angle she is coming from". What angle would that be then? (Just realised though that that question is rhetorical as you're not gonna be looking at this site anymore are you).

Finally, if people go public with issues either via the press or sites such as this then they have put whatever issue that is in the public domain. And the public have a right to respond.

Now, shall we all move on?

Andy Mac
Andy Mac
24 Jan 2011 08:13

I'm sure I'm not the only one who can sense the irony of Lynne being cyber-bullied by two people on here who disagree with her validly-held opinion. Does anyone else think that 94% approval is pretty good going? 100% would be far more preferable but nonetheless if I were a parent I'd be re-assured by that figure.

Hells Bells
Hells Bells
24 Jan 2011 09:04

Andy Mac - no you're not the only one spotting the irony of Lynne being cyber-bullied on here.

All forms of bullying are unacceptable and having had some very unpleasant experiences of bullying myself it really gets my goat.

I was bullied at primary school, at secondary school and at my workplace. The reasons I was bullied - I was that chubby asthmatic child who was rubbish at sports, I was quite shy, I would rather make friends than enemies so wouldn't speak up for myself and I preferred to see the good in people.

This was many years ago - life toughens you, to the point now where I will speak out.

I understand that this is an emotive issue but to belittle Lynne's opinions don't help, she's entitled to her opinion and to express it whenever and wherever she chooses, as is EmJarvo et al.

Personally, my child has always been very happy at DCC, I've met several of the teachers who I have found to be committed to their vocation and the welfare of their pupils.

BTW yes Hells Bells is not my real name, why would that be an issue? Surely that's the point of posting on a forum like this - you can give your opinion/share your experiences safe in the knowledge that no-one will confront you in the street!

Lynne
Lynne
24 Jan 2011 09:26

Thankyou. (and yes, the irony of my being bullied on this thread had not gone unnoticed by me either).

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