General Discussion

From our special correspondent:
Residents of the normally sleepy town of Dawlish were kept awake last night by the sounds of laughter coming from inmates of the Backyard madhouse.

In an unguarded moment, a poster named Roy had spoken of his loneliness at having been "the only voice of reason in the madhouse." This revelation by Roy that he is indeed the alter-ego of the "Voice of Reason" clears up a long-standing mystery. There have been rumours for years that a superhero of that name does inhabit the Backyard but there has been little clear evidence.

I spoke to some of the Backyard posters.
"We will certainly treat his posts with respect from now on. He has fooled us completely. He has swapped insults and hijacked threads as well as anyone. I would have defied anyone to have spotted that he was the Voice. " said V.......

Another inmate, U......., spoke of his concerns that Roy had acted as an Agent Provocateur, deliberately making posts to wind up other inmates. "I never really trusted him. There was something too pat about some of his posts. It was as if they were too irrational not to have been written by a rational person. I am not surprised to hear who he really is but it is great news to know that there is someone now whose opinions we can trust."

A third inmate, Don Pearson did not wish to be named and was unavailable for comment, saying, "I am planning to write a book analysing the hidden meanings in the famous 'wibble' posts. There can be no doubt
that the Voice was attempting to find a language that we loonies could understand. I shall review all of Roy's postings. For example, the Roddy the rooster post in which Roy talks about preserving Roddy's memory in a
glass jar. Conventional technology is not even close to keeping alive a creature's memories after death. The Voice clearly has something to teach us all."

Breaking news . . . . . . . There have been reports of an apparent link between the Voice of Reason revelation and the almost simultaneous death of Michael Jackson. More on this story later.

In the last few minutes, the FBI have confirmed that the United States is to seek the extradition of the Voice of Reason, alias Roy, on charges of first degree murder, terrorism and "being a nuisance." This confirms reports that the death of Michael Jackson was being linked to last night's revelations of Roy's true identity. An FBI spokesman said, "Mr. Jackson had a habit of lurking on the Backyard as he felt a strong affinity with its inmates. Roy must have known about it and deliberately targeted him, knowing that the revelation would kill him. We shall be seeking the death penalty on all charges."

Roy's solicitor has stated that Roy will not resist extradition and will plead guilty, despite having done nothing wrong. "Roy believes that being innocent of the crimes you are charged with does not constitute a valid
defence. He would not want to rely on that sort of technicality."

On hearing about Roy's claims of innocence the FBI spokesman retorted, "Innocent of what? Nobody's that innocent." Clearly, a man after Roy's own heart. Exactly so.

I do not suppose for one minute Don Pearson, that Roy or Fel 699 will understand a teeny witsy bitsy bit of it.

Don, that was terrific I enjoyed reading it, keep up the good work.

Nice one Don. :-)

But aren't we the same person, according to some of the loons??

You still haven't apologised to dawlishdame yet have you? Is saying "sorry" to ladies beneath you?

I am pleased that you taken my post in good part as I never intend to be offensive.

I am not sure that we are the same person but I have been accused of always agreeing with you.

Don

I'm just back from Chinaman's Knob, Australia, where I took a quick holiday to see another Aunt of mine, she lives a short flight away from my aunt in Wet Beaver Creek. Anyway back to the Voice, I actually think Roy's Don and he'd run out of insults so deliberatly writing a sketch to offer hilarity to the masses! So come on Roy are you Don, we've had a thank you love in on this post; hmmm chasing shadows in the evening sun, so romantic Mr Don and Mr Roy Pearson

ha ha ha , you have no idea the depths of my intellect old man.

a "slight" flaw in the (commendable) story there:

"Roy's solicitor has stated that Roy will not resist extradition and will plead guilty, despite having done nothing wrong. "Roy believes that being innocent of the crimes you are charged with does not constitute a valid
defence. He would not want to rely on that sort of technicality."

A certain someone was never found guilty, but we all know, including himself that he was NOT innnocent.

After the St. Valentine's Day Massacre, one of the victims survived long enough to answer the question, "Who shot you?"

His reply? "Nobody shot me."

Don

In post-squash Sunday afternoon mood, I am frivolling, delighted to discover that the word exists after deciding that it ought to (to the extent of using it anyway, even if it didn't)and looking it up.

In such a frame of mind, I have entangled myself in double negatives. Is there a big difference between,
Not guilty of nothing
and
Not innocent of nothing?

Help!

You can get yourself into the right spirit by saying the above in a London accent and adding "Guv".

Don

I aint sayin nuffink.

Inspired by the film, "Spartacus", I wonder whether we should all preface our posts with, "I am the voice of reason."
It seems appropriate as we all obviously believe that we are and it might divert the attention of the staff here.

Wait a minute..... How did that work out in the film?

Frivolling,
Don

"I am the voice of reason." GOV! Is that OK or do I need to rowl aaut the barra and offer you a Cockeney Knees Up at the Scarecrow and Mrs Johnson daarn The Owd Keeent Rowd?